Comments on: Worthless

By: shari

shari — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 16:49:54 +0000

It involves coffee filters and mason jars, bits of fresh fruit and microwave ovens. And it is super deadly.
But I’m not scary, really.

By: jenny

jenny — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 14:14:42 +0000

delmer: they were probably tired because they had just finished laying eggs on your hamburger.
shari: what's your secret for fruit flies?
tracy lynn: ain't that the truth!
vivian: i think i'll try the sage option, because the problem is that my genius neighbors are leaving not just the window open, but the screen itself. morons.
jess: i think i'd keep their names as miso and jasmine, because then i wouldn't have to get new monogrammed towels for them.
serap: what is with these cats? where is their killer instinct?
claire: ooh - send it to me, will you? although by then, the flies will already be dead and i'd have to deal with a spider infestation.
vahid: either way you say it, it's true. asshats ruin it for us all.
cheryl: well, ants are filled with formic acid, so i can kind of understand that. but flies are filled with honey and yummy deliciousness, so why won't the cats eat them?

By: Cheryl

Cheryl — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 22:04:13 +0000

Let me tell you what else cats won’t catch: ants. Ants are cute when they’re in 3D-animated movies, but when they’re chowing down on your cat food in droves for the third time in 24 hours, they are NOT cute.

By: vahid

vahid — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 21:51:07 +0000

ugh. That was supposed to be ‘these’, not ‘this’. ‘These’ summertime asshats. Oh well.

By: vahid

vahid — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 21:50:16 +0000

This summertime asshats will be the ruin of us all.

By: claire

claire — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 21:52:09 +0000

You can totally have the spider living under my bed… if only I could find it again!

By: serap

serap — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 21:02:33 +0000

I watched my cat this morning sit and observe a passing beetle, merely inches away from him, and not bother to do any more than turn his head to watch where it was headed. Useless animal.

By: jessicaprince

jessicaprince — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 20:59:19 +0000

And what, pray tell, would you name the bullfrogs?

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 19:55:04 +0000

Dear Jenny,
I recently went to the hardware store where I purchased a roll of mesh screening. You can cut the screen to size and thumb tack or duct tape it in place. Perhaps you could try this in the window in the back hall. Or try burning sage and chant demon I command you to leave this house.
Love,
Vivian

By: Tracy Lynn

Tracy Lynn — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 18:04:29 +0000

Mine won’t hunt bugs either. They said something about not getting paid for that, and referred to their agent.
Ever since they organized, they won’t do ANYTHING.