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November 17, 2005

Gratuitous Filler

“And so then I went into his office and said, ‘Look, I’m doing the work of two peop-'"

“Oh, shoot. I’m sorry – I don't mean to cut you off, but I just realized what time it is.”

“Do you have to go?”

“Yeah, I need to write something tonight.”

“What are you writing about?”

“Ugh, I have no idea. I’m all work-stressed, so I don’t have anything funny or interesting to say.”

“Post a picture – that always works in a pinch.”

“Of what?”

“I don’t know. Something. How about a puppy?"



puppy.jpg



"A puppy? I don't even have dogs. Why would I do that?"

"Well, then how about a kitten? Post a picture of your cats - people love small animals and babies."



kittens.bmp



"Mmm, I don't know. I don't really have a nice picture of my cats. Their eyes always do that glowing thing in photos, you know?"

"Okay, well then your last option is a baby. No one can resist a baby. Ooh – I know! How about a baby holding a puppy?”

“That just seems really cheap. I don't know, I’m sure I’ll think of something.”



baby.jpg



“All right, good luck. Talk to you later!”

“Okay, bye!”

Posted by runjenrun at November 17, 2005 06:22 AM

Comments

Ah, quite gratuitous. But we'll take it. We've all had our fair share of gratuitous posts. I usually post pictures of pythons that burst open after eating alligators.

Posted by: Kevin at November 17, 2005 08:43 AM

wow,
i've never been here before but your site is amazing!
and this post is just beautiful.

so profound.
i'll be back, for sure.

Posted by: jaymarie at November 17, 2005 08:57 AM

I'm guessing that the child with the huge, dark eyes is YOU. Yes? (although the fair hair...well, it's possible. I had blonde hair as a kid, and now it's brown.) Another reason I think it's you is -- the candy! A-ha!

Posted by: Randa at November 17, 2005 09:08 AM

Very nice! I love the chin.

Posted by: nicole at November 17, 2005 09:17 AM

are you eating a slice of frozen pizza...b/c that explains so much

Posted by: Nat at November 17, 2005 09:47 AM

A blistering social satire, Jenny. Right up there with Jonathan Swift. How do you do it? All that tightly-woven angst conveyed through such a benign construct? The darkness even darker for the sweetness of the vehicle? The title, itself, misleading and ironic. Brava, my friend. Brava.

Posted by: *jill at November 17, 2005 10:03 AM

Next time someone asks me what a blog it, this is the post I will send them.

Posted by: sween at November 17, 2005 10:43 AM

(Stupid spell-wrong hands.)

Posted by: sween at November 17, 2005 10:44 AM

K: Oooh - I loved that gross python/cobra photo. It was naaaasty.

J: Yes, this is quite the profound post... ;)

R: Yup, 'tis me. I was bald until I was 1, and blonde until about 4 yrs old. And that's actually watermelon, not candy!

N: Ha - my dad always said I looked like some orphan girl he picked up off the street, all covered in food.

Nat: Frozen pizza? Look, I was eating fruit, people! Why won't you believe me?

*j: OMG, you're hysterical! Yes, most people come here for the scathing social commentary. That, and the paint-by-numbers.

S: I just wish there were more pictures of puppies on the blogosphere. The world would be a better place.

Posted by: jenny at November 17, 2005 11:39 AM

I come here for the free buffet.

Love the baby picture, BTW. Great eyes on that Jen!

Posted by: The Scarlett at November 17, 2005 01:08 PM

So you were the model for those doe-eyed Precious Moments figurines. No matter... I liked you long before I knew, and this information isn't going to change our friendship one bit. Never mind that I planned to post pictures of our soon-coming puppy tomorrow and now I can't because it would be "gratuitous" and even worse, copycat gratuitous; no, no... don't worry. Our friendship will survive this knowledge that you also were the most beautiful child on the planet when we were small. That's okay. I thrive on living in your shadow. Really.

;)

Posted by: shari at November 17, 2005 05:49 PM


As for that photo, yes, you are absolutely adorable, but your mom once showed me a photo of you wearing a sheriff's badge pinned on your little strawberry decorated t-shirt. Now THAT was, to me, even cuter than the watermelon girl shot. Seems to me that there was a little boy in that photo too...wonder whatever became of him...

Posted by: Fiorello La Guardia at November 17, 2005 06:13 PM

Two things that destroy my feeling of peace and well-being when I crawl into bed at night: knowing that I ate too much chocolate and random cereal that evening and knowing that I wrote a filler post (today is a good example). Oh, and a third: knowing that I emptied out the last bottle of crappy white wine.
BTW, yours is not a filler post.

Posted by: Nina at November 17, 2005 06:55 PM

This has been that writing . . . that you were telling your friend you had to write, I mean. I love it when the reality weaves into the writing into the reality into the writing.

ALSO:

When I run out of real photos that are actually of my own family, I always to to the following:

http://www.bighappyfunhouse.com/

old photos somehow weave into your reality - even if they're not of your own family

I don't know what made me think of that site when I was looking at your photos there.

Posted by: Bobby at November 17, 2005 08:44 PM

TS: Be sure to stop by tomorrow - we have an all-you-can-eat crab leg special that's second to none!

S: It must have been cold there in my shadow, to never have sunlight on your face...

It's actually so funny you mention that, because when I was thinking of posting the puppy photo, I thought of you and how your puppy pic got like FOUR THOUSAND COMMENTS. So really, 'tis I who be the gratuitous copycat. Please post your baby dog photo! (and really, you're the sweetest - thanks!)

F: I remember that photo well. I was the most feared sheriff in the entire county fair. And that boy rode off into the sunset, I believe.

N: You should never feel guilty about eating late night cereal, unless it's Lucky Charms. And then you should feel deep, deep shame.

B: It's so true that looking at old photos makes us want to fill in the blanks. Create a history. And I love that site - it's always a fun treat!

Posted by: jenny at November 17, 2005 09:55 PM

Your Dad I'm assuming? Nice hair.

Posted by: Neil at November 18, 2005 12:26 AM

Nice post!! I still haven't figured out how to put photos directly onto my site. So I have to link to a geocities site. Lame, I know.

Posted by: teahouseblossom at November 18, 2005 08:06 AM

generally i'm a big fan of the gratuitous...

Posted by: mainja at November 18, 2005 01:24 PM

Will you marry me, Jenny?

Posted by: trisha at November 18, 2005 01:49 PM

Aw, Jenny....what a cutie pie!

Posted by: jessica at November 18, 2005 04:26 PM

N: Yup, that's my Paw. And he did have quite the 70's 'do. (I'm assuming you meant his hair, since mine is almost nonexistent in the photo...)

THB: Fortunately, that's the one thing I did finally figure out. I feel your pain, sister.

M: Gratuitous sex, nudity and violence I'm totally in favor of. It's really just gratuitous puppies I have issues with.

T: OMG, a proposal? It's so unexpected! But, I suspect your husband might object...

J: Yeah, my dad is pretty cute, idn't he? ;)

Posted by: jenny at November 18, 2005 04:54 PM

What can I say? That is just a great picture of you and your father. I have noticed that most babies who are 1/4 Sicilian have that charismatic presence.

Posted by: roy at November 19, 2005 12:04 AM

Dear Jenny,

Please please puleeeeez post that photo of you at about age 3 or 4 where you DO have hair and it's still blond, but the curls have arrived and it's all crazy hair. PLEASE??!!! I think everyone will love it.

Love,
Vivian

Posted by: Anonymous at November 20, 2005 09:35 AM