Background:
My friend Vivian lives in New York City.
She just completed her MFA in poetry.
Her parents came to town for her graduation.
She was waiting for them in baggage claim at LaGuardia.
She called me.
I was busy watching the finale of America’s Next Top Model.
For a minute I thought about letting the call go to voice mail.
I’m really glad I didn’t.
It went like this:
J: Hello?
V: Ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod! I’m standing in baggage claim at LaGuardia with my parents and ohmigod guess who was on their flight?
J: No idea.
V: Jaslene from Top Model! Their flight in from Chicago was delayed like 6 hours!
J: WHAT!! I’m watching her right now! It’s down to the final three! But I totally picked her to get booted off next! Did she win?
V: I don’t know! Some girls ran up to her and asked her if she won, and she was like, ‘I can’t really say anything.’ I think you should go change your vote. Put some money on it, too!
J: Holy crap! Wait – how did your parents know who she was?
V: They didn’t. I spotted her.
J: I think she’s going to lose. I think the blond chick Renee is going to win.
V: Hey, I gotta go. Their bags are here. I just wanted to tell you that. Talk to you later!
J: Bye!
[ten minutes go by]
V: Hello?
J: Ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod! You’ll never believe who just got kicked off!
V: Who?
J: Frickin’ RENEE!
V: NO WAY!
J: I’M SERIOUS! Do you think Jaslene won?
V: I don’t know! Maybe she did! Hey – I gotta go. We’re getting into a cab.
J: Okay, bye!
[twenty minutes go by]
V: Hello?
J: Ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod! JASLENE WON!
V: NO WAY!
[Vivian turns to parents in cab and says, ‘Jaslene won! You were totally on the plane with America’s Next Top Model!’ I think they say something like, ‘Really? Neat.’]
J: But what a bummer that she probably missed her own party.
V: Totally.
J: You get to see everything cool in New York City. Why didn’t you get her autograph for me?
V: That’s not how it works here.
J: Remember that time we saw Shandi from America’s Next Top Model on the subway and we got her autograph?
V: We didn’t get her autograph.
J: I know. But remember how we followed her for a couple blocks just to make sure it was her? That was the best. Next time I come to visit, promise we’ll see some America’s Next Top Models?
V: We’ll try. Hey, I gotta go. We’re almost to my place.
My friend Vivian is fierce.

Filed under: General on May 18th, 2007