External Monologue

“I don’t think it’s a big deal at all.”
“No, it’s not a big deal. Not a big deal at all.”
“I think he was making it out to be a big deal.”
“Well, it wasn’t. Wasn’t a big deal so I don’t know why he was making such a big deal about it.”
“I think I’m done. We’re done, right?”
“I’m done.”
[sings] “Halle, halle, hallelujah. Halle, halle, hallelujah. Halle, halle, hallelujah. Halle, hallelujah!”
“I always liked that song.”
“I like that song a lot.”
“Does the bathroom in here work?”
“I don’t know if the bathroom in here is working.”
“Is it working?”
“If the bathroom isn’t working, we’ll just go straight home.”
“I don’t know if it’s working. We should ask if it’s working.”
“If it isn’t, we’ll just go home, all right?”
“Okay.”
I often wish I were better about cooking dinner at home. It would be so much healthier, and I’d certainly save money. But if I didn’t go out every now and then to enjoy a hamburger sandwich at a diner with my fellow Chicagoans, how would I ever witness the above conversation, which occurred between a 40-ish man… and himself?

10 Responses to “External Monologue”

  1. shari Says:

    This is part two of your TC Date Expose’, right? Nice guy. He seems nice, and will completely relieve you of the drudgery of making polite conversation.

  2. peefer Says:

    I don’t think it’s a big deal at all.

  3. Tracy Lynn Says:

    Dude, that conversation is refreshingly clear; much clearer than the ones I have with myself. Maybe it’s the out loud part that does it.

  4. jenny Says:

    Shari: No, part two of the creepy picture is coming later this week. I just can’t stop meeting interesting people!
    Peefer: But do you know if the bathroom in here is working?
    Tracy Lynn: Yes, I always understand myself better when I talk to myself out loud. I highly recommend it.

  5. Jessica Says:

    I frequently talk to myself so I’m a bit symapthetic to this man – but the part that concerned me was when he started referring to a “we”.

  6. ms. sizzle Says:

    for a minute there, i thought that was your internal monologue. . .funny stuff! :)

  7. Dustin Says:

    I love overhearing stuff like that. Apparently other people love it too because there is a whole website devoted to crazy stuff you hear on the street in New York. I think it’s Overheardinnewyork.com or something.

  8. jenny Says:

    Jessica: Yeah, there was that, and the part where he kept singing Hallelujah.
    Sizz: It’s not all that different than what goes through my head, again, except for the Hallelujah part.
    Dustin: I’ve seen that site – my kind of blog!

  9. egan Says:

    I see you and I share the eavesdropping gene. It’s a wonderful trait to inherit.

  10. 3rdtimesacharm( 3T ) Says:

    LOL! I need to visit you more often! Another gem.
    Thanks!
    3T