I Cry Foul

Conspiracy. CONSPIRACY!
Action: I write about how much I love Juicy Fruit gum.
Reaction: The vending machine guy has refused to stock the machines with Juicy Fruit for the past week. And not only that, he’s now stocking two rows with Double Mint. DOUBLE MINT!
Action: I write about how much I hate fist bumping.
Reaction: Michelle and Barack Obama fist bump on national TV and everyone’s buzzing about how down-to-earth and charming the fist bump is.
Clearly, people in high places are reading my blog and conspiring to destroy my life. What’s next? I get an anonymous shipment of pistachios that are all closed shut?
Well guess what? I’m on to you, whoever you are. And now that I know you’re watching my every move, I’m going to mess with you so bad! I’m gonna go all LOLCats on your ass – im in ur hed, messin wif ur brainz!
Maybe what I write about will be true, maybe it will be lies. You’ll never know.
Next week on Run Jen Run:
“Why I hate when people send me money with no strings attached.”

16 Responses to “I Cry Foul”

  1. cloudy Says:

    haha! I saw that and was like: “Did they just fist bump? I thought that was over?”

  2. Greeneyezz Says:

    “Why I hate when people send me money with no strings attached.”
    I laughed out loud when I got to that sentence!
    You’ll have to keep us posted to see what happens.
    And should it also come true???…Make a Meme out of it and tag everyone with it! ;)
    You a funny funny Gal Jen!

  3. claire Says:

    It’s kind of nice that it’s not just me. When I posted about how much I love Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex, adult swim went from airing it 4x/week to 1x/week. The next time I wrote about it, they stopped airing it altogether.

  4. Avitable Says:

    Maybe anyone can post on your blog and see their worst fears come to life.
    I hate when random female bloggers send me photos of themselves naked, with “Avitable” written on the top of their cleavage.

  5. sizzle Says:

    Someone must be stalking you. Do you know what that means? You’re FAMOUS!

  6. Cheryl Says:

    Where do you stand on the ironic fist bump? The “I know this is outdated, that’s why it’s funny” fist bump? I have to confess I’ve participated in a couple of those, but on the other hand, I hate seeing the ironic Cabbage Patch on the dance floor….

  7. jenny Says:

    cloudy: now we’ll never be rid of it!
    ZZ: OMG – that would be the best meme ever – just like one of those chain letters: “Send this on to 10 friends or you will never fall in love again.”
    claire: how were we supposed to know the power of the blog?
    avitable: i hate that too! ;)
    sizzle: maybe i have hilly to blame for all this. i was happily flying under the radar until she gave me that award. it’s a blessing *and* a curse.
    cheryl: i’m all for the ironic fist bump – in fact, my friend nat and i were practicing the exploding fist bump the other night. it’s all in the context.

  8. Dave2 Says:

    Oh oh oh… now I feel terrible. I had an envelope packed with cash that I just put in the outgoing mail for you this morning! I will run out and see if I can grab it before they post it…

  9. delmer Says:

    Do they call the fist bump a “dap” up your way? The mayor of Columbus started doing it a couple of years ago to avoid handshaking-passed germs.

  10. Tracy Lynn Says:

    Dude, I am astounded at your power. Crazy ass shit, indeed.

  11. Karl Says:

    Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean that people AREN’T out to get you.

  12. shari Says:

    Two rows of Double Mint? I think that exceeds Federal guidelines. Call OSHA.

  13. churlita Says:

    There you go. Use the old reverse psychology. I’m sure you’ll be inundated with money in no time. If not, just think of all the money you’re saving by not buying gum.

  14. BlondeBlogger Says:

    Isn’t it amazing how much power and influence we bloggers have? I put up a post about how much I hated the “Dawn” liquid detergent commercials that said “A pump of Dawn and the grease is gone.” (because my name is Dawn…it’s almost as bad as the “crack of Dawn” jokes I grew up with). A few weeks later and voila! Commercial was changed. It was all totally me. :)

  15. Pants Says:

    I BEG you to please write about how much you hate it when I meet a nice guy, that’s not a total liar, freak or tool.

  16. sandra Says:

    You hate fist bumping? This makes me sad. Although I do love Juicy Fruit gum, so it all evens out.

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